Wednesday, June 13, 2007

sounds good!


#1: Yesterday a woman orders, from a fellow server, a single Corona with six limes. I bring her over the Corona (in one hand) and a rocks glass of six limes (in the other). I set down the beer and immediately she demands the limes. HERE ARE YOUR LIMES, LADY. IN MY OTHER HAND. BY THE WAY, WHERE THE FUCK IN THAT BOTTLE ARE YOU GOING TO PUT THE SLICED EQUIVALENT OF A WHOLE LIME?

#2: Today the B and I saw "Knocked Up," and the only other people in the theatre were a middle-aged couple and a ninety year old woman. Guess who didn't find it amusing at all? YES. THAT IS CORRECT. THE ANCIENT WOMAN DID NOT FIND ALL THE POT, SWEARING, AND USE OF THE WORD "VAGINA" AMUSING.

Pity. Funny, not hilarious, but it's got heart. Thanks to the B, who poked me repeatedly in my own parts during the scene of the crowning. Babies come from there? We've been doing this all wrong!

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Good couple of days: spent bunch of dollars on makeup and bathing suits, working my way through a 900-page bio of John Rockefeller Sr., lined up six-plus viewings of apartments in Madison for next Monday, pork and Dos Equis for dinner. I'm going to leave the laundry sitting on the couch and watch me some Top Chef while eating the greatest dessert in the world. And dear Padma, I don't care that you're married to Rushdie and the first successful Indian-American fashion model... in that preview, where you kick the water at the very beginning, you look rather stupid.

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