yeah, but at least with an MFA I can write a properly punctuated blog post.

This morning MSN asked me "Could You Get Into Grad School?"

Ha, I said. MSN, I've been in grad school. Ha.

I scored 2 out of 5. There may be a reason why I went for an MFA in creative writing, the least of which being the fact that my GRE scores were hilarious. Verbal was pretty strong, math was in the 20th percentile. I actually put "E" for most answers, "E" being "insufficient information provided to answer this question." Because, I didn't have sufficient information -- sufficient information in the form of a smart person to copy off of.

You know how the questions get easier or harder, depending on how well you're doing? By the end of my GRE math test, I should have been answering questions like

What is the name of this shape?




a) square

b) triangle

c) shit, I used to know this. I remember knowing this. I remember taking a test like this in seventh grade math with Mr. S., does that count?

d) ha, remember Mr. S. and how he wore those glasses that change colors in sunlight so that whenever we had a fire drill and came back in they took forever to change back to clear so he'd teach wearing the equivalent of sunglasses for like five minutes?

e) ugh, remember how I had that class second mod* and gym first mod so that during the swim unit I had to sit through math class with dripping wet hair, reeking of chlorine? and I knew at that point that I was not the type of girl who was going to have a date for Class Night or any other dance for that matter?

f) fuck you, GRE. I don't even really need to take you. I'm only here because OSU wants my score, and only my verbal score at that. And I'm tired because the closest test location was UB, forty-five minutes away from Fredonia, and had to sleep last night on the floor of a dorm room belonging to a girl who I sort of knew in high school who is actually much better friends with my younger brother, so it was sort of awkward, and I wore these slip-on fake Airwalks that I just bought but I didn't wear any socks, and it's August so my feet were all sweaty and smelled, and I was afraid to take off my shoes in case she smelled them so I slept with the shoes and only got three hours of sleep anyway?

g) dude, didn't Liz get like a perfect score on her GRE?

h) insufficient information provided



*period