those wacky deutchmen

This blog turns four today! Happy birthday, blog. Here is a huge picture of what it looks like outside:

Keep on doing what you're doing, blog. You get visitors from all over the world! Granted, most of the traffic that comes from Europe doesn't stick around very long, most likely because it's a direct result of the search query dead bitches--or the occasional Aaliyah dead bitch--but those are wacky Deutchmen! Always looking for the dead bitches. You know, the ones that don't say no.

I have a blog titled Dead Bitches and a book called Before I Came Home Naked. Somewhere, my father is shaking his head slowly, wondering where it all went wrong.