now with 80% fewer photos

1.
This morning I dreamt that I was a redneck fisherman, drifting in an aluminum boat through a Carolina swamp, drinking a can of beer.

Swamptastic!

2.
One of my students stayed behind today and, as I waited for her to gather her things from the room, I commented on her giant white furry mittens.

Nice Yeti mittens, I said.

You're going to think I'm crazy, she says. But they're made from my dog. I have a Great Pyrenees, and we gave all the fur he shed to my aunt, who combed it, spun it, and made it into our Christmas gifts.

THAT IS BADASS.

3.

We are beginning to run out of things to eat for dinner without our oven. Today I ate half a bruschetta burger for breakfast and the whole time I spent chewing the soggy, microwaved foccacia, I cursed my landlord.


4.
It's been decided than instead of getting real jobs after this year, we are all going to move somewhere and open a bar/theatre/coffee shop/used bookstore/eatery. Right now the bar/theatre/coffee shop/used bookstore/eatery opens at 11 for lunch and closes at 2 am. We'll serve decent pub food, nothing too crazy, but solid good shit, and everyday we'll feature a rotation of three soups. (I make the soups. I just decided right now.)

Everybody has a sandwich named for them on the menu, which is what this is all about. Thus I debut:

THE STEENASmoked peppercorn turkey breast, melted Havarti cheese, and sautéed onions grilled on marble rye. Stuffed (post-grilling) with fresh alfalfa sprouts and served with a side of dill dressing (a combination of fresh chopped dill, Hellman's, and milk).

I ate that exact sandwich every afternoon I worked at The SoupHerb Gourmet during the summer of 2000, and it was fucking awesome.